Jan was daydreaming on the Tube late one night, and this was the result... I tried to channel Richard O'Brien for the voice, but it didn't work, so I whacked on the effects instead.


I am malachite, gleaming green,
And the stone in my head has a delicate sheen.
I am the toad on the green-line tube,
And if you see me, you're coming unglued.

And I'm hard as a stone, and I don't have a home,
I'm more faithful than any damn dog.
You can conjure me up from misery's cup
And you're never alone with a psychic frog.

I have pale blue glistening eyes.
I listen in secret to everyone's lies.
I am the toad and the toad is the road,
And if you see me, let me shoulder your load.

I can tell you're in hell, so come out of your shell
Let your darker self out for a jog.
I'm the powerful friend, the wild journey's end,
And you're never alone with a psychic frog.

The stone that I bear is a stranger to blame.
It warns against venom and guards against shame.
I am the toad and the toad is the goad,
And if you see me, you've broken the code.

Through the rain of your tears as you face your dark fears
And your mind slowly falls off its log,
You will see my broad grin just inviting you in
And you're never alone with a psychic frog.

The milk that I bear bodes nobody good.
It gives glittering visions and strips paint off wood.
I am the toad and the master of fate,
And if you see me, it's already too late.


from The Toad and other Strangenesses, released May 4, 2015
Lyrics by Janet M Warner, music by Zander Nyrond.




Zander Nyrond Westbury, UK

Zander Nyrond likes to describe himself as a logical necessity, though he knows perfectly well he is nothing of the kind. "If I had not existed," he says grandiloquently, "I would have had to invent myself." A more pertinent description would be "tall, hairy idiot which makes music and does not wear a hat," though even that is derivative. Lives in Wiltshire and has better friends than he deserves. ... more

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